Celebrity Horoscope for Jim Varney

You might come across as being cool, aloof and dispassionate. You may even have cold hands or feet, become easily chilled and have a slow metabolism. Without a lot of work, life's fast lane is probably not for you.

TIP: Add more red coloring to your wardrobe and your environment. Add ginseng to your diet. Eat more spicy foods, especially cayenne pepper. Enjoy more moderate physical exercise early in your day. Get a home that faces south. Live in a warm, sunny environment. Use a fireplace or a wood stove. Burn candles.

Fewer than two planets in Earth signs
ABOUT GETTING GROUNDED

Because of a certain restlessness and discontent, you're not the most practical person in the world. You may even be a bit spacey. In fact, sometimes you may wonder if you are of this world. Try using a to do list to your advantage. Train yourself to do important things with the force of habit. You may be disinterested in the mundane. As long as stability alludes you, so will a complete and happy life.

TIP: Get the things of the earth into your home.

Add some live plants to your environment. Fill your home with tile, pottery, wicker, ceramics, rocks and crystals. Spend more time in the present moment. Constantly remind yourself to "be here now". Eat more solid foods such as stews, soups, cooked grains and casseroles. Get more into your body. Treat yourself to regular professional massage. Find a sport or exercise regime that you can enjoy. Walk around in your bare feet in the cool dewy grass. Work to acquire a sense of steady rhythm and endurance.

Four or more planets in Air signs
YOUR MIND IS YOUR MOST VALUABLE ASSET

Your mind is your most valuable asset; you could be an intellectual. The world of ideas is important to you. Intellectual companionship, seminars, books, magazines, films, and educational cassettes interest you. Feeding your mind is just as important as feeding your body. School can be the place for you.

TIP: In the words of Robert Anton Wilson, "You need to learn more about everything, including how to learn more."

People fascinate you and you tend to regard them in a detached manner. Consequently you enjoy teamwork and social interactions more than most folk. Sentimentality does not figure highly in most of your relationships.

You can excel in any field that requires negotiation skills. Sales and writing may be avenues of pursuit. You have an affinity for abstract reasoning, codes of law and ethics - you're very good at perceiving, comparing and communicating. You are much more objective than most people, and probably more liberal in your thinking.

Your weakness is not foolishness so much as it is indecisiveness. Too much thinking can result in lost opportunities. There is a time to get out of your head and make a decision. If you find that you can't sleep because your mind is racing, get up and work with your ideas. Get ideas down on paper, onto index cards, into a word processing machine or up and out into the airwaves.

Consider getting a brain machine and taking "smart drugs." Learn speed reading and typing. To avoid overstimulation, cut back on the use of artificial sweeteners and sugar. To the same end, you might take a mineral supplement and kelp tablets.

Essentially, you're articulate, versatile and adroit. Put another way, you like variety. You're an idea person. It seems that your mind naturally likes to go from subject to subject. You have varied interests and like to keep up with what's going on in the world. You are encouraged to cultivate your natural communication skills. You're the original "quick study" who grasps facts, concepts and ideas. On the other hand, you can get bored easily and do not like things to drag along.

TIP: To be your best, you need open lines of communication.

Your best friends are the ones who appreciate your sense of humor. Follow your curiosity. Travel and education tend to bring out the best in your personality. Meet some new people.

Even though you're a very mental person, your emotional life can take some extreme turns. Your mind has a vast scope and you have a variety of big interests including progress, individualism, science, the future and the great unknown that lies ahead. Once you break the ice, you are an excellent conversationalist.

You tend to process emotional events in advance. When things happen, they already seem to be in the past. So, you may seem to be emotionally detached and aloof. You need space and can't stand to be suffocated. When you're under too much pressure, you become emotionally detached and erratic. Your feelings can freeze over both literally and figuratively. You can be cool. Your mother was probably not very nurturing, especially in the traditional sense.

To be yourself you need to become more tolerant, especially of emotions. If you're not happy and have been holding on to opinions, try letting go and warming up. You may fret over your emotional life for many, many moons, then suddenly, it will come together.

Be open to flashes of intuition. Perform some experiments. Embrace the unconventional. As you become more secure in your own personal freedom, you will become more secure in your relationships with others.

Typically, you're not at a loss for words. More likely you can earn a living through your voice, ideas and powers of persuasion. You're quick, clever, curious, versatile and witty.

Home and family matter to you. You appreciate art and music. In affairs of the heart, you need to be loved, pursued and reassured. You want to be indulged and you don't really turn on until you feel secure.

You have plenty of intellectual energy and you go get what you want by speaking up, speaking out and saying what's on your mind. People with new ideas and new ways of thinking turn you on. Your voice is emotionally charged and can inspire others to action.

Tolerance contributes to your prosperity. You may espouse some rather grand and progressive ideas. Bring them to life. Get involved with humanitarian causes. Join your kind of service club and social organization. You can do big things with your originality.

You can be practical, exacting, hardworking, moral, orderly, conscientious, and a perfectionist. For you to get past your limits you must learn efficiency, accuracy and precision. However, you must pay some dues before you learn to distinguish trivial pursuit from what is necessary to success.

To become yourself it may be necessary to make a break away from your home and family. Your personal life is unsettled. Probably you're fond of electronic devices. You get a 7-year itch to free yourself from restrictive domestic situations.

It is probably a good idea for you to steer clear of people heavily involved with alcohol and religious fanaticism. For at least 5 minutes a day for 5 weeks focus your mind exclusively on the meanings of this statement, "All observation tends to be self observation."

You're here to find yourself, be yourself and express yourself. The hell of it is that jealousy and power struggles are issues you must squarely face. Jealousy is not necessarily a trait of yours. However, you'll have to deal with the jealousy of your peers and in business.